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Everything is fine here. Everything. The sky is blue, the hydrangeas are in bloom, and the slimy weight of July has yet to fully descend. I have no real problems. I have money, food, housing, and health.
Also, I have the most amazing family, and I've loved every second I've gotten to spend with them the past few months. My husband is very handsome, kind, and funny. My kids are decently behaved, despite being raised without rules of any kind. The dog is adorable and doesn't shed.
Everything is fine here. My husband retains enough of his good looks and hair to cause me to swoon so hard I hardly notice the empty boxes of things he inexplicably leaves in the cabinets and freezer or his migration around the house while he takes work calls. I'm so thankful he is extremely health conscious and makes nutritious smoothies in the blender, which is really not that loud, several times a day. I use it, too, but it sounds different, almost musical, when I use it.
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The intense blue of his eyes easily distracts me from the way he insists on always being there, but not in a figurative way. He is literally just there, as well as here, in this room and also that room, I swear at times simultaneously. He is never not there. Which is so wonderful, because, from the day I first met him, I never wanted to spend even a minute apart. It only look 18 years, but I finally have my wish. Now there are even more used forks and cups left out for intended but rarely realized reuse, and each of them is an adorable, quirky love letter to me. As are the piles of clothes at the foot of the bed brilliantly organized into the following categories: Recently clean, Clean at one point, Did I wear this in the last week, and Dirty but I can't commit. He's so funny. I never tire of his jokes, especially now that I hear them so much more frequently.
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Not to mention he has single-handedly saved us all from the COVID, with his Dr. Fauci-like protocol, hand-washing oversight, and rinsing and reheating of the take-out. I prefer my salads wilted and my meats dry anyway, and there's really no way I would properly wash my hands without supervision. It is so sweet how much he cares that I remain alive.
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Everything is fine here. The kids are so good about following a schedule without assistance. They wake up early (in Fiji) and glide seamlessly from movies to TV shows to You Tube to Wii to Switch to iPad to Kindle Fire. I don't even have to remind them. They can even scoop their own ice cream, they're so productive. The best part is I know where they are all times because they are in my house. I don't ever have to worry about pedophiles or rabid dogs anymore. I don't have to worry about them hurting themselves doing any form of physical activity. It's such a relief. Just to keep life interesting though, they do change rooms frequently. They are diligent about watching both TVs, sometimes at the same time, in order to ensure they are both working. Same with the various plugs around the house. You can't have too many charging stations, and now we know that all the plugs in our home are in working order.
Everything is fine here. I have no real problems, and I have plenty of time to do all the chores three or four times and cook gourmet meals, if I want to (I do not). I have time to wait on everyone hand and foot, and they all deserve the extra attention (they kind of do not). They are all so beloved, there is really no reason why I would be angry every time one of them enters a room where I have gone to avoid unidentified other people for unknown reasons because all the people here are wonderful and I love them all so very much. There is no reason that I would have flown into a rage the other day and impulsively dragged a desk and chair into the guest room and proclaimed it my office. That is silly, because I have no work to do! It's like I have a pretend job, how precious. My family members are all very nice and well-adjusted. There is no reason why their sweet, human touch would cause me to recoil. There is no reason why I wouldn't want to spend all my time in a massive dog pile of human affection.
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Everything is really just fine. It turns out the dog isn't really obese, he just needed a hair cut. It turns out he didn't have separation anxiety, either. What a relief to know that he is just crazy all the time, and we don't have to feel guilty about leaving the house. Which we will totally do again someday.
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Everything is 100% fine here. I am an extrovert, and while I miss some friends, a lot of them were annoying and maybe this will reset things and I can start fresh with the ones I actually like. Also zoom is really fun, it's almost like being trapped in a really boring video game with bad lighting.
Everything is fine here. I just have something in my eyes that is causing me to blink and wink. If you discern some meaning in the movement of my eyelids, like a pattern or code, you are surely mistaken. I am not sending you any kind of desperate message. There is no reason why I would want you to intervene in any way. I am smiling because everything is fine, and I would hate for you to think otherwise, break into my house while everyone is sleeping, and whisk me off to a cabin in Montana, at which point you would leave because I am also struggling to tolerate you (no offense). I would absolutely hate that, because everything is fine here and I am a people person, I love people. So please don't take me to Montana. I hear it is terribly temperate this time of year and also there are hardly any people there. It sounds horrible and lonely.
So please, just go on about your day. Everything is absolutely fine.
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Also, I have the most amazing family, and I've loved every second I've gotten to spend with them the past few months. My husband is very handsome, kind, and funny. My kids are decently behaved, despite being raised without rules of any kind. The dog is adorable and doesn't shed.
Everything is fine here. My husband retains enough of his good looks and hair to cause me to swoon so hard I hardly notice the empty boxes of things he inexplicably leaves in the cabinets and freezer or his migration around the house while he takes work calls. I'm so thankful he is extremely health conscious and makes nutritious smoothies in the blender, which is really not that loud, several times a day. I use it, too, but it sounds different, almost musical, when I use it.
The intense blue of his eyes easily distracts me from the way he insists on always being there, but not in a figurative way. He is literally just there, as well as here, in this room and also that room, I swear at times simultaneously. He is never not there. Which is so wonderful, because, from the day I first met him, I never wanted to spend even a minute apart. It only look 18 years, but I finally have my wish. Now there are even more used forks and cups left out for intended but rarely realized reuse, and each of them is an adorable, quirky love letter to me. As are the piles of clothes at the foot of the bed brilliantly organized into the following categories: Recently clean, Clean at one point, Did I wear this in the last week, and Dirty but I can't commit. He's so funny. I never tire of his jokes, especially now that I hear them so much more frequently.
Not to mention he has single-handedly saved us all from the COVID, with his Dr. Fauci-like protocol, hand-washing oversight, and rinsing and reheating of the take-out. I prefer my salads wilted and my meats dry anyway, and there's really no way I would properly wash my hands without supervision. It is so sweet how much he cares that I remain alive.
Everything is fine here. The kids are so good about following a schedule without assistance. They wake up early (in Fiji) and glide seamlessly from movies to TV shows to You Tube to Wii to Switch to iPad to Kindle Fire. I don't even have to remind them. They can even scoop their own ice cream, they're so productive. The best part is I know where they are all times because they are in my house. I don't ever have to worry about pedophiles or rabid dogs anymore. I don't have to worry about them hurting themselves doing any form of physical activity. It's such a relief. Just to keep life interesting though, they do change rooms frequently. They are diligent about watching both TVs, sometimes at the same time, in order to ensure they are both working. Same with the various plugs around the house. You can't have too many charging stations, and now we know that all the plugs in our home are in working order.
Everything is fine here. I have no real problems, and I have plenty of time to do all the chores three or four times and cook gourmet meals, if I want to (I do not). I have time to wait on everyone hand and foot, and they all deserve the extra attention (they kind of do not). They are all so beloved, there is really no reason why I would be angry every time one of them enters a room where I have gone to avoid unidentified other people for unknown reasons because all the people here are wonderful and I love them all so very much. There is no reason that I would have flown into a rage the other day and impulsively dragged a desk and chair into the guest room and proclaimed it my office. That is silly, because I have no work to do! It's like I have a pretend job, how precious. My family members are all very nice and well-adjusted. There is no reason why their sweet, human touch would cause me to recoil. There is no reason why I wouldn't want to spend all my time in a massive dog pile of human affection.
Everything is really just fine. It turns out the dog isn't really obese, he just needed a hair cut. It turns out he didn't have separation anxiety, either. What a relief to know that he is just crazy all the time, and we don't have to feel guilty about leaving the house. Which we will totally do again someday.
Everything is 100% fine here. I am an extrovert, and while I miss some friends, a lot of them were annoying and maybe this will reset things and I can start fresh with the ones I actually like. Also zoom is really fun, it's almost like being trapped in a really boring video game with bad lighting.
Everything is fine here. I just have something in my eyes that is causing me to blink and wink. If you discern some meaning in the movement of my eyelids, like a pattern or code, you are surely mistaken. I am not sending you any kind of desperate message. There is no reason why I would want you to intervene in any way. I am smiling because everything is fine, and I would hate for you to think otherwise, break into my house while everyone is sleeping, and whisk me off to a cabin in Montana, at which point you would leave because I am also struggling to tolerate you (no offense). I would absolutely hate that, because everything is fine here and I am a people person, I love people. So please don't take me to Montana. I hear it is terribly temperate this time of year and also there are hardly any people there. It sounds horrible and lonely.
So please, just go on about your day. Everything is absolutely fine.
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